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She was well spoken, in her early thirties, attractive and not pushy. Part of my brain began turning: At our first meeting, we discussed everything you might expect: Then, a house call. My matchmaker informed me that, to get to know me, she needed to visit my home. Exactly how all this fed into the matchmaking process, I never would come to know, aside from it perhaps confirming that I was good for the fees.
Regardless, I set to work on defining Miss Right more thoroughly: She enjoys walking, family, socialising. I set an age range, attached photos of women I fancied and hit Send.
Less straightforward was my attempt to get that profile memorialised in the contract somehow. Yet my matchmaker was very good at not using aggressive sales tactics. Take your time; look at other options, she advised, while emailing me teaser profiles: In any other realm finding a home, hiring a key staff member I would never entertain paying all of the fees up front, with no part contingent on the basic delivery of the service let alone a successful outcome.
However, matchmaking is different. It deals in affairs of the heart.
Best dating sites for seniors: Dating over 60 doesn't have to suck
A contrarian, non-commercial streak in me embraced the romanticism of it all. Certainly I was persuaded that it would be odd, and probably indeed impossible, to pay a financial bounty upon meeting a romantic partner. Moving in together, marriage? None of this adequately explains why per cent of the fees needed to be paid up front.
This was never convincingly answered, perhaps because my agency never needed to. It would be unfair to call introduction services confidence tricks, but my role in the arrangement increasingly came to feel like that of the mark.
There would be no close matches — not even a short-term relationship, let alone anything serious or marriage. One of the very first matches was the most promising: But a month later, her calendar miraculously opened up. Within six months, my matchmaker had gone on maternity leave and was replaced by two other staff members. Before long, I asked for a partial refund and you can guess how that went. One curiosity throughout these match-made dates was that I, the man, invariably felt an obligation to foot all bar and restaurant bills. This was, apparently, the norm in these higher-end dating arrangements: Why should this be, in an era of greater gender equality?
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Just how unbalanced could things get on this expensive dating journey? I was about to find out. Here, a deeper truth about the way this exclusive dating world works was revealed: There are different theories as to why this is, one being that women are more willing to invest substantially in finding the right life partner, another being the perception of a depleted pool of eligible men in other walks of life.
Speed dating over 50 nyc
Unwittingly I asked whether this was pounds or dollars. It was pounds, of course; we were sitting in a Chelsea pub, not in the West Village. Her own eyes narrowed. Finally I offered alcohol. Champagne, that ever reliable pick-me-up.
Here's a look at some Singles Over 50 Meetups happening near New York.
Most dates were pleasant enough. Indeed, two women became friends. Matchmakers meet clients in person for just a couple hours of their lives, and feedback given after each date does little to alter this reality.
At this event, we expect up to 10 men and 10 women to participate, and each date will be for 5 minutes. Sunday, January 20, at 5: Women 21 - 35 , Men 23 - Meet up to 30 singles at this mega speed dating event! You'll chat with around 30 potential love interests for 3 minutes each, and the next day, we will inform you of any matches the people you picked who also picked you. Includes complimentary light appetizers. On the same night we are hosting our Singles Party at the same venue from 8pmam. Everyone who attends this speed dating event can stay for our party at no additional cost. Sunday, January 20, at 8: Women 21 - 45 , Men 23 - This is a 2-for-1 event; if you buy 1 ticket you can bring a single friend for FREE!
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With fun ice breakers, complimentary appetizers, a cash bar, and fun prizes, our party will be the hottest event this town! Music will be at a volume conducive to conversation.
Choose Your Event
Thursday, January 24, at 7: Friday, January 25, at 7: Women 23 - 36 , Men 25 - This speed dating event is for Asian single professionals. We expect around 10 men and 10 women to participate, and each date will be for 5 minutes. Saturday, January 26, at 6: Women 30 - 43 , Men 31 - Thursday, January 31, at 7: Women 26 - 38 , Men 27 - This speed dating event is for Indian single professionals.
We expect around 10 men and 10 women to participate, and each date will be 5 minutes. Saturday, February 9, at 6: Women 22 - 36 , Men 23 - We expect 50 men and 50 women to participate.